Marriage | Food for Thought

 

Suggested Passages

  • Matthew 19:1-9

Questions

  • The Pharisees approach Jesus with a question: “Is it legal to divorce your wife for any reason?” This was probably to get Jesus to “take a side” in a current religious debate about if / when / why it might be legal for a married couple to split up.

    • Before we get to Jesus’ answer, how does the Pharisees’ question reflect a tendency in us to define relationships by when we can get out of them, lines we (or others) can’t cross, etc.?

    • In what ways does “the way out” of any relationship (work, friendship, volunteer, dating / marriage, family, etc.) tell you something about the relationship?

  • But instead of directly answering the question, Jesus speaks about creation and marriage as it was first seen in (and patterned after) Adam and Eve. Why would Jesus go all the way back to the beginning in order to answer a cultural question of the day about divorce?

    • What do we learn about the origin, nature, and purpose of marriage from Jesus?

    • How does this compare or clash with our culture’s understanding (or even the church’s!) of marriage?

    • How does (or doesn’t) this actually answer the Pharisees’ question?

  • The Pharisees acknowledge a tough reality: the way marriage was intended to be, hasn’t actually been that way. And it seems like God actually permitted people to undo his permanent intentions for marriage in the laws he gave to Moses. According to Jesus, why would God do that?

    • How does our hardness of heart (our own or others’) lead to other laws, exceptions, boundaries in life and relationships - for better and/or for worse?

    • Why doesn’t Jesus let us bail for whatever reason on marriage, even though we know that hardness of heart is a real thing? What’s different about adultery that would allow that to be an exception?

    • How does the gospel compel us, free us, and empower us to turn towards people with hard hearts - in marriage and in other relationships?

    • How does this ultimately point to the gospel itself and the picture of marriage that’s supposed to look like Christ and the church (Ephesians 5)? How can this show up in smaller ways in other relationships you have?

 
Redeeming RelationshipsScott O'Donohoe